January 15, 2010

A Good Week Draws to an End

I have enjoyed this week, certainly more than the week before. I have been busy, my schedule more full than it has been in a long time. Yet, it was also one of more reflective moments than I normally have. An interesting paradox, the busier I get, the more I pause to ponder life, faith and my role in the world. I mark the time, I march to the drumbeat, yet I seek to stop and smell the flowers. I strive for balance, yet I look to avoid compromise. I want for me, I want to give. I grab a hold of at the very moment I relax my grip and release.

Painfully apparent to me are my own shortcomings and imperfections, but I am happily ware that my faith in the Lord can carry me through. There have been moments of deep peace, there have been times when I could feel the tension and anxiety mounting up within me. And I can easily tell you which of those times I tried to take charge and in which I was letting Jesus lead me. The fact is I never seem to learn to let Him do it all the time, but maybe those moments of self indulgence are the ones that focus me back on what truly works, the truth of my faith.

I keep moving forward seeking a better balance, but with a divine definition of a successful day. He is the only answer for me, the only I ever needed.

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